Trips Published Wed Apr 01 12:00:00 SAST 2015

People are constantly offering us trips: a beer after work, a coffee, a cigarette on the balcony, a business opportunity or a cross-country road trip[^1]. Good or bad, relationships develop on trips.

You can get on any roller coaster, but you can't know on which part of the ride you'll scream. Arduous trips result in deeper connections...or spectacular implosions, and the strongest relationships are built on many, mighty trips:

“If you think you found the one, take that person and travel around the world. Travel places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And…when you land at JFK, and you're still in love with that person, get married at the airport.” — Bill Murray

The 'trips' metaphor is shaky because anything that means all things to all people means nothing at all. So what isn't a trip? Is being born? Is getting cancer? No, those are not choices, but the experience can still be shared. A more accurate term might be shared experience with agency, or chosen path, but I prefer 'trips'.

Any trip can be meaningful and fun when shared with the right people, even a flat tire in the middle of the desert! It's all part of the journey.

“Being in a relationship, that's something you choose. Being friends, that's just something you are. [But] I do pick you. We've been friends too long to pick, but if we could pick, I'd pick you.” ― John Green, Will Grayson

When you start seeing shared experiences as opportunities for building relationships, your perception changes. And besides, bad trips make the best stories. So if you want to have more rewarding relationships, say yes to more hard trips.

[^1]: Isn't it interesting how often psychotropic drugs like caffeine, alcohol and tobacco are involved?